A Life Without Regrets
by ATTHS
Summary: Mulder takes his mother out to dinner unknowingly on Valentine's Day. She gives him some advice regarding Scully and not living a life with regrets.


Mulder stood outside his mother's house, adjusting his tie and smoothing his hair, before knocking on the door. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he heard shuffling from inside. He opened his eyes when he heard the door knob turning a few seconds later.

"Fox, hello," his mother said happily.

"Mom," he said, leaning in to kiss her cheek. She smiled at him as he stood back and put his hands in his pockets.

"Do you want to come in?" she asked him, gesturing to the open doorway.

"Uh, well the reservation is for 7:00, so we should probably get going," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

She smiled as she put on her coat, picked up her purse and locked the door on her way out. He put his arm out to her and she linked hers through his, patting his arm with her other hand. They walked down the stairs and to his rental car where he opened the door for her and waited until she was settled before he closed it.

It was cold out and his breath came out in white puffs of mist. He shivered as he got in and started the car, turning the heater on medium blast to warm them up. She smiled at him and he smiled back, backing up the car and then heading down the road.

Tonight was the first time he had had a chance to get away and visit her. Plans had been discussed for the past few weeks, but work always got in the way. It had been a while since they had seen one another and neither spoke much as they drove to the restaurant he had chosen for them.

As always when he was around his mother, he felt guilty that he was not doing more for her, or at least visiting her more often. Theirs was a strange stilted relationship and he always left feeling they could have more, but knew they never would. Too much past and hurt was there to dig through, it was better to keep it neutral and on the surface.

Arriving at the restaurant, he parked the car, got out and opened her door for her. Again she took his arm as they walked, admiring the white lights in the trees, the ambience they created, and the area in general he had chosen.

Opening the restaurant door, he was overwhelmed by the amount of people inside waiting for a table. It was then that he noticed the heart decorations. Balloons, cardboard cutouts stuck on the wall, confetti on the damn floor.

Holy shit. It was Valentine's Day.

How could he have forgotten what day it was? He turned to his mother and she seemed to be just as stunned as he was at the decorations. She met his eyes, her own just as wide in surprise, and shook her head.

"May I help you?" the hostess in a pink sparkly dress asked him, looking harried. He looked at his mother once more and she shrugged with a smile. Oh, they were in it now, he thought.

"Yes. I have a reservation for 7:00, under Mulder," he said, sighing. Dinner with his mother on the most romantic date of the year that was just .. perfect.

"Yes, Mr. Mulder. Just one moment please," she said as she walked away.

"Well, Fox," his mother said, stepping next to him. "It seems we are on some sort of date. Isn't it just so romantic?" He glanced at her and saw her smile as her eyes twinkled. He laughed softly and she nudged him with her elbow.

The hostess came back, her pink dress shining and loud as she walked. She grabbed two menus, and led them to their table, which was covered with red and pink tablecloths, adding to the awkwardness. He held the chair for his mother and then sat across from her. The hostess handed them their menus, sighed, and walked away. His mother caught his eye and this time they both laughed.

They debated over the items that looked best and then ordered their food. As they waited for it to arrive, he asked after her friends, the club she belonged to, and any events she had coming up. She told him of a woman they had known for years, Rebecca Myers, and how she had planned a gala for later that year. She had asked his mother to help with it and Mulder could see the happiness it created in her eyes. He smiled, happy she had events to fill her days.

Their dinners arrived and after many comments over the presentation, as close to heart shaped as possible, they both began to eat. He asked for the dessert menu when they had finished and convinced his mother to get anything she wanted. She looked for a bit and then suggested they share something called the "Chocolate Lovers Desire" despite its horrific name. He cringed and then laughed, nodding in agreement.

Glad it was simply brownies, chocolate ice cream, chocolate sauce, and chocolate chips, and not some overly decorated romantic dessert, they both ate it when it arrived. When they had eaten their fill, she asked for a cup of coffee. He declined one, but sat back and relaxed while she drank hers, full from a delicious meal.

"So, how is work, Fox?" she asked as she added cream and sugar to her cup. She looked up at him and he nodded.

"It's good. Uh .. we recently are back to working on the X-Files," he said, picking up a fork and spinning it in his fingers.

"Back? Were you not working on them?" she said, surprised to hear his news.

"Uh .. no. There was a different team working the cases for awhile, but now Scully and I are back to working on them. Actually we have a case coming up soon that will take us out of town for a few days," he said, his eyes on the table.

"I see," she said, setting down her coffee cup. "And how is .. Scully? Dana, right?"

"Yeah, it's Dana," he said with a smile.

"It's always so strange to hear you call such a beautiful woman by her last name," she said, shaking her head.

"Beauty has nothing to do with it, Mom," he said, looking at her in surprise. "She's just .. Scully."

"Are you told by the FBI to call each other by last names so it doesn't get too personal?" she asked him, watching his face.

He laughed at the idea of last names stopping them from being "too personal." Any chance of them keeping their working relationship strictly professional went out the window the night she came to his room and literally disrobed in front of him. The trust she put in him to not do anything other than what she asked had solidified their partnership.

"No, we don't have to call each other by last names. I did it the first time we met to .. I don't know, bother her, push her buttons, see what I could do to annoy her, and it just stuck," he said with a small smile, remembering the young Scully he had turned to find in his office. So green, yet tough as nails, pushing back and not letting him get away with anything.

He looked up to see his mother watching him and he stared back at her. She raised her eyebrows and smiled at him, picking up her coffee to take a drink. She said nothing, but he knew that look, he had seen it most of his life. She was setting her mind on something.

Finished with her coffee, the check paid, he helped her with her coat and handed her her purse. She took his arm as they walked out of the restaurant. That guilty feeling was back, knowing that after tonight he probably would not see her again for awhile. He would say he would come up, or meet her somewhere, but it never happened. He really needed to try harder and be around more.

"Fox," she said, stopping him by the car door. "I had a fun evening with you, despite the overly romantic aspect of the restaurant." They both laughed again and she put a hand on his arm. "Thank you for dinner, Fox."He nodded and smiled at her, patting her hand on his arm before he opened the door for her, got in and drove back to her house.

He walked up the steps beside her, wanting to make sure she made it safely inside. She dropped her keys in the holder by the door and began to unbutton her coat. He helped her take it off and hung it on the rack for her, before putting his hands in his pockets. She turned to him with her hands clasped and smiled at him.

"I truly did have a fun night, Fox, thank you," she said, watching him intently.

"You're welcome, Mom," he said. "Next time I'll try to find a place even more romantic. Maybe more confetti?" She laughed before stepping close to kiss his cheek.

He took his hands out of his pockets and hugged her, closing his eyes when she hugged him back. He stepped back and started toward the door, ready to leave, but also feeling like shit for wanting to do so.

"Fox," she said softly. He turned around and looked at her, finding her eyes sad. He stepped closer to her again and held her gaze. "I worry about you sometimes. Or I did. No, I do. I'm sorry." She touched her face and closed her eyes.

"Mom?" he quietly asked.

"Sometimes .. I'm fine and then .. I get hung up on my words," she said, her head down. She raised her head and looked at him, taking a breath. "When your father died .. at the funeral, Dana .. Scully, she came and told me she was sorry about your father, but she knew you were okay and you would be found. I was taken aback. I didn't know her from Adam, but she was sincere and obviously knew you well enough to not feel worried the way I did. I didn't understand it, but I saw and felt it. and it calmed me."

Mulder knew what she meant, Scully had the ability to calm him and make him see things differently. His impulsive nature was quick to push things to the forefront and Scully could give it pause with a simple look.

"I've not spent much time with her, but when I have, I've seen how she cares for you. Even when you're being .. rather vocal and persistent," she said, giving him a pointed look, causing him to drop his head. "So, while I do still worry about you, Fox, it does not compare to how I did before I met her and I saw how she cares and worries. I know she will be there to cool that hotheadedness of yours, and that .. that helps me sleep better at night."

He remained standing with his head down, opening and closing his fists, letting her words wash over him. They had a calming effect, the same way Scully's presence did. He looked up and saw tears in her eyes, but a smile on her face.

He stepped to her and hugged her, holding her longer this time. He heard her sniffing and he knew she was crying softly, just as she always had. He pulled back and held her face in his hands, taking a deep breath. She put her hands on his wrists and they simply stood there silently, the clock on the mantle softly chiming the hour.

He kissed her forehead and stepped back, stroking her cheek as he moved his hands from her face.

"I don't know what I ever did to deserve to have someone like her in my life," he said quietly, surprising himself with his outspokenness, keeping his eyes on the floor. His mother laughed softly and he looked up at her. She smiled and shook her head, placing her hand on his face.

"Deserve? No, Fox. You needed her and someone knew it. In whatever capacity her role fills in your life .. it's what you need," she said kindly and softly. "I think you know that already, but you haven't done what you need to do to show her. Fox, you have to show her."

"Mom, we're not .. she's not .." he said, stumbling over his words.

"Fox," she said, taking her hand from his face and grasping his hand. "She cares for you. She is important to you, someone you care about and sometimes .. sometimes those we care about .."

She paused and dropped her head. He waited, his heart pounding. They did not do this, have these open conversations. He would not push it, but wait for her to finish her thought.

"Sometimes they hurt us the most, and sometimes without even knowing it," she said quietly, her head remaining down. He swallowed and felt tears in his eyes which he quickly blinked away.

She finally looked up and she smiled at him, her eyes full of tears. "I won't pretend to know your relationship, but I know regret and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Don't live with regret, Fox."

He stared at her and she smiled sadly at him. His childhood and questions he knew he would never have an answer to were reflected in her eyes. The regret she warned him of was there at the surface and he knew she was right, it was something she knew much about.

He nodded and she wiped her eyes, nodding back at him. She smiled at him and took a deep breath, clasping her hands and locking her fingers together.

"Good night, Mom," he said quietly, touching her hands, and she nodded again.

"Show her, Fox," she repeated softly, and he nodded.

He walked out the door and to his car. She stood in the doorway seeing him off as he drove from her house. He looked back at her in the rearview mirror and saw her walk back inside and turn off the porch light. His thoughts returned to his mother's words and he reached for his phone.

Dialing Scully's number, he waited nervously while the phone rang, not exactly knowing why. It was not as if calling her late at night was not a normal occurrence. He loosened his tie and sighed.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Scully, it's me," he said, his heart pounding.

"Hey, Mulder. What's up?" she said with a yawn.

"I'm sorry to call so late," he said, glancing down at the clock in the car. 10:00, not so late.

"Mulder, it's barely 10:00. I'd hardly classify it as "late" when it comes to calls from you," she scoffed, and he imagined her rolling her eyes. He chuckled and his nervousness dissipated.

"Well, after the night I had, Scully .. God, does it feel late," he said, getting on the highway and heading for the hotel he would be staying at for the next couple of days.

"Oh, did you have an interesting evening?" she asked him, her tone inquisitive.

"Yeah, I had a dinner date," he said, passing a car that was going fat too slow.

"Did you?" she asked, somewhat quietly.

"Yeah. Our plans kept falling through, but we were finally able to meet up. Tonight of all nights," he said with another laugh. She was quiet and he laughed again as he thought of the romantic setting of the restaurant.

"Did you know it was Valentine's Day today, Scully?" he said, shaking his head.

"So you .. you had a date on Valentine's Day?" she asked, still quietly.

"Scully, honestly, I had no idea of the date. You know how I can get. Since Christmas, things we've had going on and things she's had planned .. there just hasn't been a chance. Until we walked in the restaurant, neither one of us apparently knew the actual date. My face one hundred percent mirrored the shock my mother felt when it became clear," he said laughing as he thought of her face when they had realized the date.

"Wait, what? Your mother?" she said, sounding surprised. "You had dinner with your mother? On Valentine's Day? Oh, Mulder." She giggled and his eyes widened. He rarely heard her laugh that way.

"Yeah," he said, drawing out the word. "I came up here this morning and I'm staying at a hotel for a couple days. Scully .. my mother and I .. we shared a dessert called, you ready for it? Chocolate Lovers Desire." She laughed harder and he smiled wider as he heard it. She continued to laugh, no doubt imaging their discomfort, and he laughed quietly with her.

He was glad to hear her laughter and her happiness. The past few months had been touch and go with them. Diana coming back and pushing her way into their lives had created a huge problem. He had never seen Scully as angry and hurt as she was when Diana was around. He knew he had added to it with his desire to want the Diana he knew in the past to be the one he saw now. It took him a long time to see and then to actually hear Scully's words. She had been right of course, Diana was not the person he knew anymore.

Since then, they seemed to be walking a tightrope. They were hesitant and seemed to be unsure who they were to one another. Diana knowing of his past, and being someone he had trusted implicitly, had seemed to be what bothered Scully most. He had not done much to ease her suspicions or assure her of her place in his life.

Jesus Christ, his mother was right. Sometimes those we care about do hurt us most. He had hurt Scully and he needed to fix it. He needed to show her. This upcoming case might be just what they needed to get back to who they were.

Or, they might kill each other.

"So, you're going to be back in a few days? We leave next week," she said with a bit of warning.

"I know, Scully. Since Skinner gave us this time off, I thought I would visit my mother. Like I said, our plans kept falling through, and as we have no idea how long we'll be gone in California, I thought this was a good chance to do it," he said, getting over toward the exit to the hotel. "I never thought of the dates and this was the only one that worked for both of us. As far as Valentine's dates go though, I can't lie, she was one of the better ones." Scully laughed again and he smiled.

"So what did you do on this most loving of days, Scully? Hot date?" he said, keeping it light, testing the waters.

"Not exactly, but it's still early yet, you never know how the night will end," she said and he could hear her smile. Suddenly he wished he was not over four hours away and could swing by with flowers and a box of chocolates. Maybe a movie they had both seen before. Cheesy yes, but it would be funny and maybe make her smile.

"Well, you keep on the lookout. Vigilance always pays off," he said, too many thoughts crowding in his mind. Too many "what if's" running up to him with their plans and possibilities.

"Mulder, I'm always on the lookout. Eyes on the prize and all that," she said softly.

"Hmm," he hummed quietly, thinking but not daring to voice that perhaps the prize in her eyes could be him. They were both quiet as he pulled into the hotel parking lot and parked the car.

"So, there is still the paperwork needed to fill in the names we've chosen. Skinner said he needs those soon. You have them, right? You said you were going to take care of it," she said, breaking the silence and steering them away from a touchy subject.

"Yeah, it's all at home. I'll finish it when I get back in a couple of days," he took the keys from the ignition and sat in the quiet car, not wanting to hang up and wishing again that he was closer.

"Okay then, goodnight. I'll talk to you when you get back, Mulder," she said.

"Goodnight, Scully. See you soon," he replied and waited for her to hang up the phone. He sighed, got out of car, and walked to his room.

He tossed his coat on the chair, took off his shoes, walked into the bathroom and started the shower. Undressed, he stepped into the warmth of the water. As he stood there, he made a decision. This case would be the starting point. He would be subtle, but he would start letting her know what he wanted and see if she responded in kind. He did not want to live with regret and not letting her know how he felt, well, that would be a huge one. One he would never forgive himself for if he missed it.

Dried and in his pajama bottoms, he laid down in bed and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes, an idea beginning to form. He smiled as he turned over and began to fall asleep. He knew what he would do. It was a perfect plan.

The next couple of days, he meandered through the town, stopping in little shops looking for something meaningful and personal, but it was not until the last day that he found it.

Stumbling upon an old bookshop, he entered, not knowing exactly what is was, but feeling this was the place he would find it. He took a second to take a deep breath, the scent of old books always a favorite. The place had appeared smallish on the outside but it was quite big and filled with rooms of books. Floor to ceiling, books were stacked from every genre.

He walked around the shop, finding book titles from his childhood that made him smile and even comics that he had loved. He touched them and picked them up, his eyes runnng over the old familiar stories. He walked around and looked at the titles, the way one might look at art in a museum.

Back in one of the smaller rooms, one he had had to duck down to enter, his eyes landed almost immediately on a book that seemed to have been waiting for his arrival. He took it from the shelf and examined it. It was in good condition considering the age of the book. The cover was plain brown, but the title and author was in gold lettering. He turned the pages and found it to actually be in very good condition- no tears, rips, or missing pages. The back cover was also in good condition.

Turning the book over and looking through the front pages again, he smiled when he found the inscription. He closed the book and nodded his head. This was what he had been looking for, the way to begin to show her how he felt.

He took the book to the register and when he heard the price, he cleared his throat, his eyes widening. He took out his credit card and waited, hoping there was enough available credit to make the purchase. When it cleared, he exhaled. The shopkeeper wrapped the book in white tissue and then placed it in a bag, handing it to him with a smile. He thanked her and walked out of the store, smiling as he imagined how Scully would enjoy the gift.

He flew home Thursday morning and filled out the paperwork needed. He took it in to Skinner's office and left it with his secretary before heading to the basement. Scully was not there, having the days off herself, but he finished up some work she had started that needed his signature, and then he left.

He stopped at a restaurant and made a reservation before arriving at home. He cleaned his apartment, doing dishes that had stacked up, laundry he would need for the trip, and changed his sheets. After he was done, he paced around the apartment, nothing left to do.

He grabbed his keys and decided to pay the Gunmen a visit to take his mind off the boredom surrounding him at his forced time off. He spent the next couple of days engrossed in conspiracy theories, video games, and eating whatever concoction Frohike came up with. It was fun, but he was ready to get back to work. Sunday night on his way home he called Scully, ready to put his plan in motion.

"Hey, Mulder," she said, happiness in her voice. "Where have you been the past few days? I haven't heard from you since last week."

He laughed, happy to hear her voice. "I got home Thursday, dropped off the paperwork, and I've spent the past few days with the guys," he told her.

"Three days with the guys? Good god, that means a lot of crazy theories are coming my way," she muttered with a sigh.

He laughed again and she laughed quietly with him. "Yeah, if you can believe it, it was almost too much for me," he said.

"No, that I cannot believe, Mulder," she said with a scoff.

He smiled and closed his eyes for a second, taking a breath. "Hey listen, Scully. Tuesday night, I'd like to take you out to dinner," he said quickly.

"Oh," she said. "Tuesday?"

"Yeah, if you don't have plans that night. You might be seeing your mom, I suppose, but I just thought maybe if you weren't, I could take you out," he said, hoping she would not say no. "It's your birthday."

"Yes, Mulder. I know that Tuesday is my birthday," she said with a chuckle. "I don't have plans with my mother. But, I don't know, Mulder. It hasn't been four years yet."

"Four years?" he asked, confusion in his voice.

"Isn't that how you like to celebrate birthdays? Every four years? Dog years, I believe you called it?" she asked jovially.

He laughed, feeling relieved that she did not have plans, and she might actually be up for dinner before they left.

"Okay, yeah," she said. "Dinner sounds great. Mulder, just promise me something though, no craziness this time. No downed planes or abductions, okay? Just dinner and maybe dessert. Chocolate Lovers Desire sounds good." She laughed and he joined her.

"All right, no craziness and I'll see what I can do about the dessert," he said, making her laugh again.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow for the final days of intel before we leave," she said, still chuckling.

"Tomorrow," he said, and hung up the phone. He smiled, happy to be moving forward.

Monday and then Tuesday were full of last minute papers to sign, rings to pick up, even clothes to pick up, personal information to receive and go over. Scully had stared at him, hard, when she saw the names he had chosen for their undercover assignment. He knew he was going to hear it later when they were alone.

They were given the names of the agents they would meet with the next day upon arrival in San Diego and then they were sent home. Mulder took his things with him and packed up the god awful clothes he was to wear. A pink polo shirt? Jesus Christ ..

He picked up the wedding ring he was given and he smiled as he tried it on, not entirely hating the way it looked. He rang his thumb over it, before taking it off and adding it to his carry on bag.

He took a quick shower and dressed for the evening. Casual dark jeans, undershirt and a dark blue sweater. Boots and a jacket completed his outfit. Grabbing his keys, wallet, and her gift, he left to pick up Scully.

When he arrived, she answered the door in clothes he had never seen her wear before. She gestured to the outfit and sighed heavily.

"This is one of the outfits I have to wear," she said, rolling her eyes.

"You look good," he said, looking her up and down and shrugging his shoulders.

"Mulder," she said, pulling on the cardigan she was wearing. "I look like my mother. Sweater sets are not my thing. Jesus." She sighed again and looked at him. He smiled and shrugged again.

"I'll go change," she said, taking a deep breath, and turning to leave the room. He noticed she had the ring on her finger, as it sparkled in the light. Not wanting to make a big deal of it, he said nothing, but smiled as she walked away.

"How dressy is this place?" she called out from her open bedroom.

"Casual is fine," he called back, looking around her place as he always did when he was over, taking a peek into the life she had away from work, away from him.

He had his back to her when she came out, but the sound of her shoes made him turn his head. His breath caught as he looked at her. She was wearing a black dress that was not too dressy but absolutely beautiful. She had on black shoes and she was putting her earrings in as she walked by the table. He watched her fluff her hair, pick up her lipstick and look in her compact as she put it on. She rubbed her lips together before wiping her mouth, making sure it was good. He noticed she had taken the ring off and he was not sure if he felt good or bad about it.

She put her lipstick and compact down and turned to him with a smile. "Ready?" she asked. He nodded, not quite able to form words.

She grabbed a jacket and put it on, picking up her keys and opening the door. He walked out, with her following. She locked the door and they walked down the hall and to his car. He opened the door for her and she gave him a funny look. He shrugged and smiled at her as he closed the door.

They drove to the restaurant discussing the case they were going to be working on tomorrow. She sighed and rolled her eyes at the way she would be dressed and how she was to act, like a little dutiful wife. He told her it would be all right and hopefully they would wrap the case up quickly. She sighed again and looked out the window.

They arrived at the restaurant and he offered her his arm as they walked from the car. She shook her head but accepted it. He opened the door to the restaurant and placed his hand on her lower back as he ushered her inside.

The hostess led them to their table and after removing their jackets they sat down. Mulder asked for two glasses of red wine and Scully smiled at him. They looked at their menus, silent as they decided what they wanted to eat. The waitress brought over their glasses of wine, and took their dinner order. Scully smiled at him and he smiled back.

"Are you nervous about tomorrow, Mulder?" she asked him, her face serious.

"Nah, it will be fine. We got this," he said, shrugging.

"Living together? For who knows how many days? Mulder," she said, staring at him, giving him the patented Scully look.

"We've spent time together like this before, many times, Scully. Cases, quarantines, same hotel rooms. This will be fine," he said, shrugging again. "Anyway, let's not discuss the case right now. It's your birthday, and we are here to celebrate."

He picked up his glass and raised it, with her following suit, and they clinked their glasses together. They drank some wine and fell into small talk. She asked after his mom and laughed when he told her in more detail about their "date." She told him that she had seen her own mother and they had had a good lunch, although not a romantic one. He laughed at her teasing him and she smiled.

Their meal arrived and he told her about the Gunmen and what they had done. She closed her eyes and shook her head, putting a hand to her face. She looked at him as if in pain and rolled her eyes. He smiled and she smiled back.

The plates were cleared and Scully asked for the dessert menu. The waitress looked at Mulder, he nodded slightly, and she walked away. He glanced at Scully and she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Mulder," she said questioningly.

"Scully," he said, his expression giving away nothing.

"Happy birthday to you .." came singing from behind him. He turned around and looked at the waitress and other wait staff as they came to their table. She set the cake down in front of Scully and they continued to sing until the song was over, clapping as they finished and walked away. Scully blew out the candles and looked up at Mulder with a smile.

"Mulder," she said softly.

"Scully," he answered with a smile.

She looked down at the cake and saw the small overly decorated cake full of flowers and frosting. She pulled the candles out and put them on her napkin, taking a swipe at the frosting and sliding her finger in her mouth. She closed her eyes and moaned, causing Mulder's breath to catch, and his jeans to feel tighter.

"Mmm, cream cheese," she said, opening her eyes and looking at him. He smiled and she picked up the utensils the waitress had set down, cutting them each a piece. Her eyes lit up when she saw it was chocolate inside.

They ate their dessert in silence, wrapped up the remaining portion, Mulder paid the bill, put on their jackets, and headed outside. Scully took his arm with no prompting and he smiled, though she did not see it. He opened the car door for her again and they headed back to her apartment.

He parked, took the leftover cake from the backseat, slyly grabbing her gift at the same time, and opened her door again, once more to her amusement. They walked to her front door and she looked at him, silently asking him to come inside. He nodded and followed her in, closing and locking the door behind him, but remaining standing in the entryway. She slid off her shoes and walked into her room, dropping them inside before coming back to stand in front of him.

"Thank you, Mulder. I had a wonderful time. No funny business and a delicious cake," she said, taking it from his hands. When she did she saw the gift he held underneath it.

She looked up at him with inquisitive eyes. "Is that for me?" she asked, looking back down at the tissue wrapped gift. He cleared his throat and nodded. She smiled as she set the cake down on the table and turned to him.

He had taken off the plain white tissue the shopkeeper had put on it, and instead wrapped the book in purple tisse paper and tied it with a white ribbon. It was not cleverly disguised, but he was not trying to make it so, as he knew she would know it was a book as soon as she had it in her hands.

He handed it to her and she smiled when she held it. She glanced up at him as she untied the ribbon and began to open the tissue. Looking back down, she gasped when she saw the title of the book.

"Oh, Mulder," she breathed, dropping the tissue paper to the floor. She ran her fingers over the lettering and down the spine. She looked at him and she had tears in her eyes.

"Moby Dick," he said unnecessarily, but not knowing what else to say.

"Yes. It's beautiful," she said softly as she began to look through the pages, smiling at the words she saw and knew by heart.

"I don't think it's a first edition, but it's definitely old," he said, clearing his throat again, as he nervously put his hands in his jacket pockets.

She thumbed through more pages and smiled, stopping on some, reading passages she obviously loved and wanted to revisit. He watched her enjoy her gift and he felt his heart race, knowing he still had one more thing to show her.

"The inscription is really what made me decide to get it for you," he said quietly.

She looked up at him and he smiled at her, nodding to the book. She let the pages go and flipped to the front of the book. A couple pages in and she gasped again, touching the words, and shaking her head.

"Mulder," she said softly, tears in her voice.

He smiled as he watched her touch the words that had made him purchase such an expensive gift. He knew he made the right decision when she took a deep breath and read it out loud.

""To my Starbuck,"" she said quietly, again shaking her head. She looked up at him and her tears spilled over, before she had a chance to wipe them away. "Thank you, Mulder. This .. this is a wonderful gift."

"I mean, I guess it's better than an Apollo 11 keychain, but you know," he said with a shrug and a smile.

She laughed softly and looked down at the book again. "I love it, Mulder. Thank you, truly." She looked up at him again, smiling, tears still in her eyes.

He nodded and took his hands from his pockets, holding his keys, feeling nervous even though the night was over and it had gone well. She stepped back and set the book on the table. She came back closer to him and put her arms around his neck, and he put his arms around her waist.

"Thank you, Mulder," she whispered, kissing his cheek as she pulled back.

He nodded again, glad she could not hear the pounding of his heart, and she smiled. "You're welcome. Happy birthday, Scully," he said, stepping back and reaching for the doorknob.

She bent and picked up the paper she dropped, tossing it onto the table. He stepped through the door and she followed him into the hall.

"See you tomorrow, Mrs. Petrie," he said, turning around to look at her, his eyebrows wiggling.

"Pe-trie," she said, staring at him with the same hard look he had seen earlier, shaking her head

"Like the dish," he said, snapping his fingers and pointing at her. She laughed and then flipped him off, making him laugh as he waved at her as he turned and walked away.

When he got home, he put all his bags by the front door, ready for the early flight tomorrow, and then headed to bed. He got to his bedroom door and turned around, walking back to the front door. PIcking up his carry on bag, he reached in the front pocket and took out the wedding ring he was going to wear. He slid it on again, and went to bed, twirling it around as he lay there. It had been a good night, the foundation had been set, and he had no regrets. He smiled as he turned over and closed his eyes, the cool metal of the ring different and yet comforting.

"I'm almost certain it's in there, Mulder," Scully called to him, as he stood in the office, looking for the little book they had been reading last night.

He was not able to find it, but as he turned to leave the room, his eyes landed on a book on the shelf, one he had not noticed in a while. He picked it up and held it in his hands, the weight of it achingly familiar. He looked again at the inside cover and at the inscription. He touched it lightly with his fingers as he thought of the Valentine's Day with his mother when they ate that decadent chocolate dessert in an overly decorated restaurant

He heard laughter from the other room, and then coos and gurgles. He smiled as he closed the book and thought of his mother and her words of wisdom that night about Scully. She was right, he had needed to show her, and not live with regrets. How different his life would have been if he had not listened to her on that night.

He shook his head as he put the book back on the shelf, knowing one day they would read it to Faith. For now though, he would go see what his ladies were up to, what was eliciting so many giggles. He looked at the book once more, the memory of his mother's smile and words of advice, bound within the pages of the tale of a mighty whale, and he smiled.

He walked through the office door and into the living room, finding Scully dancing with Faith as she held a pink balloon by the string and sang to her. He looked at the table, seeing the flowers he had had delivered on this Valentine's Day. A big bouquet for Scully, full of pink Asiatic lilies, Peruvian lilies- or Alstroemeria as Scully had informed him, and pink and red roses.

He also had a smaller one delivered for Faith. Baby pink roses, pink Gerbera daisies, and white snapdragons. Pink and red balloons were added to the bouquet and Faith had been entranced by them. Scully had looked at him with the look that he knew meant he would be thanked for his thoughtfulness later. He smirked as she turned away, knowing exactly how to get to her after all these years.

He grinned as he walked over and wrapped his arms around them both, joining the little dance party. Scully laughed and it filled him with happiness. He kissed her temple and vowed that he would continue to do what his mother had advised and show Scully every day how much he loved her. Big, small, and every way in between.

Life was too short for regrets.


End file.
